 |
|
|
why is it that only now i feel insecure i have never felt this way before in the past i don't know why i'm just so apprehensive about what's going to happen next but then again when i ask myself why am i doing this i have absolutely no idea this darn problem of mine... always not knowing what i want. causes all sorts of problems. i hate myself. the last time i was unsure there was someone to give me a big hug. i guess this time i stand alone and i was the one who chose to be as such, so don't whine big baby.
since chubitaaa said she'll update about yesterday. i will too. yesterday studied at kap with rice and chubitaaaa not very efficient cause SOMEONE was playing with my photo booth and we just kept laughing well done. then chubishhhaannn came with lam to join us. when we all watned to go supper, i went to my car and found out that my car remote wasn't working (i think cause i dropped it. HAHA) anyways, so i called my dad to come down with spare keys but after we put down the call suddenly it worked. soooo hoorayyy. (: after supper, lam and chubishannnnn's friend came to join us and he's driving a MANUAL CAR. so guess where i activities ended up at. AHAHA. DRIVING MANUAL CAR DAMN SHIOK. sericeously. after fetching chubitaaaa and rice back to hall then the rest of us went foong seng for drink by the time we left for home it was like 5AM. ahaha. what a night.
starting to lose my determination to study feel like its all happening so fast and i don't exactly know what i'm doing and if i'm putting effort in the right way and right place. but i'm still hang in there feeling alittle apprehensive on how my uni life will be in the next few years to come but i guess this is the decision i have made and it is still the way i want my life to be so i just have to try my best and take steps forward. Now I realize that I really didn't know...
i protect you when anyone crtiticise you i feel so dumb when others tell me so i'm not sure how come i had so much trust in you but anyway i did i now i feel like an idoit not sure of what's going to happen nor what i can do. i hope it won't turn out that way.
why is everyone reminiscing the past recently everyone misses what we all did last time its either the present sucks or the past just rocked big time. i would have to say its the latter the present is great with all the new friends and everything but the past was even better i miss having all our informal outings here and there our meetings at the canteen before training our regular breaks and lunch at canteen night study during weekdays in school and additional weekend chiong at my house or others' watching drama on channel 8 together finding huiren in the middle of the night there's just so much to miss someone reminded me of my own words yesterday that no matter how much we miss the past it will never return like how it was back then.
|
author Michele all these while...
February 2011 |